Too much

I could have kept going. 20 Min WODs are interesting cause you eventually switch over to aerobic phase... And cause I've been Crossfitting for over a year and 8 months, I have decent endurance. So when 20 mins hit, I still had some fuel in my tank. I mean, with surviving WODs like "Murph" (67 mins) or Filthy Fifty (38 mins) 20 mins seems to be that middle time where your body isn't at high intensities, nor is it completely depleted. 

I think I should have made it a 12 min AMRAP and gone really hard. 

Either way, I did feel good after the wod. My arms are gonna sore. I was able to do my 15 DUs unbroken for 6 rounds out of the 11. 

An aside:

I've really really been trying to tap into all those virtues that seem to allude me, like: patience, acceptance, 

loving EVERYONE. I feel sometimes I'm being swallowed up by the crazy, little voices in my head... The ones that cause suffering. I'm trying to have a healthy relationship with my suffering. The more I resist the more I FEEL it. I've been employing deep breathing a lot lately. It's like I have to talk myself down from the ledge every FUCKIN' day.... Then rationale sets in, and I feel foolish.

Does this have to do with some deep seeded issue of inadequacy or self-loathing? It's soooo tiring. Why can't I just stay grounded in my heart all the time?

I just want to cry.

I'm GOLDEN

Every minute on the minute for 30 minutes, perform the following:

1 Squat Snatch

20 Double Unders

I think I did well. I'm a little upset that I didn't last longer doing the 1/20 DUs on the minute. I was having trouble getting into a rhythm during minute 9 and 10. I literally had 1 DU left when the minute changed over. I was pretty bummed about it. so with 20 mins left I managed to fit in 13 rounds. Within those 13 rounds, I was "greased" up enough at that point to really land my snatch. I went light for 2 reasons: I wanted to work on perfecting my technique, and two, my back is still acting up. When I commit to the snatch and I stick the landing... that feeling of being solid at the bottom of the squat, mid line tight, arms locked out, shoulders active... the feeling is GOLDEN. 

I was able to do 20 DUs straight through 5 times out of the 20 rounds. Felt pretty awesome :) 2 of those five times I collapsed on the floor with retching, pukie feeling in my tummy. Thinking back, I was pretty miserable the whole last 15 mins. So I'm quite happy that I survived it. 

At the end of the 30 min clock, I laid out on my back and felt the blood rush to my face. I felt ALIVE. I immediately iced my lower back/left nalga. As well, I consumed a sweet potato a la Rico. 

It is now 11PM, and my "back" is bad. I'm not even sure if it's my back. The pain can be described as radiating from the hip joint/socket, shooting up my back. It feels like electrical shocks. There are no specific movements that trigger the pain, but it has now encompassed bending forward from the hip, turning from the hip with feet in place, sitting with my weight on that left side, standing with weight on that left leg... There really isn't time when I'm absolutely in comfort. I'm concerned. I'm not sure what to do. Actually I know what I have to do, but I'm a stubborn, hard-headed donkey and I really don't feel like taking time off from training. 

Tonight I plan to go to 24hour CVS and buy some epsom salts and have a long soak in the tub. I can't wait. Another 10 hour day at work. Tomorrow looks like a 14 hour day. Shoot me. Is it Sunday yet? Having brunch with the hot cougars on Sunday. We're actually coming into the Hotel. I think I'm going to get schnookered. I'm starting to feel really unappreciated and overworked. In response to feeling overwhelmed, I emotionally ate today; I had Linguini and Clams. While I completely enjoyed the dish while consuming it, I felt really gorss and guilty afterwards. Tomorrow is a new day to make better choices :)

Besides work and this injury, my spirits are high. That feeling of yearning has left me. I'm not in want. So all the good things that happen feel like a BONUS.